Leadership Tips

You are probably a member of a popular club right now. It's called the Stress Club. It is not an exclusive club, by any means. And, there is no fee to belong. But the cost of membership is high. In my work with clients and in my own personal experience, I've noticed we live most of our lives on auto-pilot. We react in habitual ways without giving it much thought. This is true of our response to stress, also. Too often, our habitual ways are not productive or healthy. Some of us turn to self-destructive behavior in an attempt to find relief. We turn to food or drink for comfort, are more irritable with our loved ones, and snap at complete strangers.

Habits are hard to break! But, if you want to create new, positive and healthier responses to old triggers, follow these tips:

1. Focus on issues that you can control.Sort out the things that you can do something about and those that are out of your hands. Spend your energy in places where you can make a difference. Don't rehash old news or worry about what might happen. If you think that your job may not be secure stay focused and continue to shine. Give it your best while you are there. Begin to make plans now to cut expenses at home and line up contacts who may be able to help you if you are laid off. If you think you may need to cut staff, begin to make plans as to how you will deliver the message, help the affected people out and get the work done with fewer people.
2. Find good in the situation. Consider the possibilities that current circumstances might create. It may not be obvious in the moment, but I've seldom seen a difficult situation without the potential to result in some gain. It might be as simple as learning just how resilient you are, or it may be that you get the job of your dreams after being laid-off. Being open to change and seizing the opportunities it can present is one of the best ways to make things work to your advantage.
3. Rise above the gloom and doom. It's true what they say, "Misery loves company." But it's tough to feel good about yourself and the world around you at the end of the day when all you've done is focus on the negative in the company of others who are doing the same. Instead, spend time with people who are optimistic, active, healthy and forward-looking. Stay on track with what you want for yourself. If you are committed to being healthy, stay with that intention. When you are tempted to bury your fears in chocolate, stay strong. Find a healthy alternative for soothing your angst. Go for a walk, meditate, get busy on a project, or make a positive contribution to someone else.
4. Take positive action.We all have things in our lives that are less than ideal - a vendor that is not delivering on their commitments; those 5 pounds that you meant to lose before the holidays; the clutter in your office - things we've been tolerating. Like the proverbial pebble in our shoe, after a while they irritate to the point of pain. Take control of these annoyances! Most of them are things well within your control and for those that aren’t, manage your reactions to them. Identify that daily irritant and resolve to correct the situation, or put a corrective action plan into effect, before the end of the week.
5. Be Bold. In the 1983 movie Risky Business, Miles, one of the characters, said, "Sometimes you gotta say 'What the heck!*' (*politically correct version)...saying 'What the heck!' gives you freedom and freedom brings opportunity. Opportunity makes your future." Be willing to take some risks. Follow your heart.

A client was recently laid off after for 9 years with the same company. He considered taking a lesser role at a lower salary. But, after giving it some thought, he decided to take a risk and accept the severance package. Sure, he's nervous, but he's also relieved. The company really wasn't a good fit for him and his travel schedule didn't leave much time to be with his two young children. Even though he's understandably concerned, he has a decent severance package and some emergency savings that will give him time to look. And he's taking some time to get clear on what he really wants to do next and what environment he is best suited for. Imagine how differently he will show up for his family and in job interviews coming from the place of possibility versus the place of blame, anger and gloom and doom! And, how much better do you think he feels when he gets up every morning? And he's proud of the personal power he exercised in making the choice that was right for him.

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Want more help to manage your stress? Contact us at (781) 453-2211 so that we can discuss your next steps.